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Without meeting you or seeing you in action it is hard to know how you come across to others.But one thing I do know is that the majority of people find it off putting if someone is too keen, too needy, too self-conscious or thinks too little of themselves.I tried to ignore this taunting however it did really hurt and often I would cry to myself wondering why this was happening to me.I had no gay friends during my teenage years, so all my friends were straight and most of them had their first romantic relationships during that time.My family totally accepted my sexuality and it was such a relief (as many gay people say).
Friends are giving me their support and giving me different advice: 'You are trying to hard', 'You are not trying hard enough', 'Someone will come round the corner soon', You are too fussy', You do not have enough gay friends to meet someone', 'You need to like yourself before someone will like you' etc. Many thanks Jason Dear Jason, You get ten out of ten for effort.Perhaps you still feel people are ridiculing you and maybe you find it hard to trust people or to accept if someone is genuinely interested in you.Perhaps you still suppress your emotions and find it difficult to really express how you are feeling or maybe you still feel like an outsider looking in watching other people living life.Let’s take a quick look at each of those reasons in turn and see what you could do to improve matters. You end your letter by saying that you think some of your childhood experiences may have made you “insecure about building relationships.” That could well be the case.
At school you were never accepted for who you were, you were ridiculed because of whom people assumed you to be and you felt forced into the role of observer whilst those around you enjoyed relationships and their first encounters of “love”.
And when you meet new people – concentrate on being interested in them rather than worrying whether they like you.