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13-Apr-2019 19:03

Your virginity hangs around your neck like an albatross. Like there’s a great fault within you that’s holding you back but that nobody else seems to have.What are you supposed to do about the fact that you’re one of the Great Untouched?We come up with increasingly baroque reasons why we have been uniquely disadvantaged – we’re too “beta”, for example, for the notoriously “hypergamous” women.The PUAHate forums that Elliot Rodger frequented take this to an almost fascinating extreme, comparing brow ridges and jaw angles and eye space in some sort of unified theory of sexual phrenology.They talk about feeling broken or unworthy, that they’ve missed some sort of open time frame where they could lose their virginity and now they’re (metaphorically) screwed.It feels like to 50 – that they can’t bring themselves to talk about it.And believe me, it wasn’t much better for the women I tried to date, either.I hurt a number of people in my quest to get my dick wet and, at the time, I didn’t care.

that much in hopes that I might hit that metaphorical home run.On Monday, I talked a little about the toxic culture surrounding masculinity and how it hurts men.Today, I want to start the conversation to help dismantle it.We get the Standard Virginity Loss Narrative burned into our minds early on, reinforced over and over again by pop-culture until we start to believe it’s the TRVTH, carved into stone tablets delivered to us at the base of Mount Sinai.

The story turns our sexual development into a performance, just as masculinity is often a performance.They can’t bring themselves to approach women, so they don’t have opportunities to lose their virginity. We live in a culture that seems to go out of its way to imply that everyone is having sex and you aren’t. In fact, the number of people having sex in high school is actually from 54% in 1991 to 43% in 2011.



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